Alligators
Eating Republican Congressmen
Two
alligators were sitting at the side of the swamp
near Washington, DC. The smaller one turned
to the bigger one and said, "I cain't understand
how you kin be so much bigger 'n me. We're the
same age, we was the same size as kids. I just
don't get it."
"Well," said the big 'gator,
What you been eatin' boy?"
"Republican Congressmen,
same as you," replied the small 'gator.
"Hmm. Well, where do y'all
catch 'em?"
"Down 'tother side of the
swamp near the parkin' lot by the capitol."
"Same here. Hmm. How do you
catch 'em?"
"Well, I crawls up under
one of them Lexus and wait fer one to unlock
the car door. Then I jump out, grab 'em on the
leg, shake the shit out of 'em, and eat 'em!"
"Ah!" says the big alligator,
"I think I see your problem. You ain't gettin'
any real nourishment. See, by the time you get
done shakin' the shit out of a Republican congressman,
there ain't nothin' left but an asshole and
a briefcase.