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Would Jesus? - by Doug Long

George W. Bush has said his favorite philosopher is Jesus. If that's so, then there must be some things about Jesus that I don't understand. Perhaps George could answer a few important questions for us:

"WOULD JESUS?"

George, you've done a lot of killing.
And you do it with aplomb.
Perhaps you would be willing
to say: Who would Jesus bomb?

You've killed thousands in Iraq,
And you keep on killing more.
There's some info that we lack:
Would Jesus start a war?

You knew before your war began
Your reasons wouldn't fly.
So won't you tell us if you can:
To whom would Jesus lie?

It's almost time now to adjourn,
So won't you let us court your
Opinion on this big concern:
Who would Jesus torture?

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