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Parody: A Visit from St. George
(with apologies to Clement Moore)


'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through Iraq
There was bombing and shelling, troops under attack.
The imam in his mosque and the Shia in Iran
Were warning Americans, "Leave while you can!"
My flak jacket hung on the back of a chair,
Next to my list of schools to repair.
I was lying exhausted, prostrate on my cot,
Thinking of all the things we had not,
When out on the grounds of the palace I heard
The bang and the hiss of a shoulder-launched bird.
The blast blew the window apart in a flash
And covered us all in a light coat of ash.
With helmet and rifle I ran to the breach
To bag a few Baathists who might be in reach.
The moon shining bright in the black Baghdad night
Illumined a plane near the end of its flight.
When a seven four seven came down with a whoosh,
I knew in a moment it must be George Bush.
It rolled to a stop, the door opened wide,
And Dubya came forth, and all those inside.
More rabid than foxes his courtiers they came,
And he whistled and shouted and gave them new names;
"Now, Rummy! now, Wolfie! (Each name, how it fits 'em!)
On Condi! on Cheney! It's time now to blitz'em!
From the door of the plane to the vast dining hall!
Now, dash away, dash away, dash away all!"
As sands from the desert are blown in a swirl,
Down on the tarmac swooped old Richard Perle
Who, faced with reality, always denied
That anyone, anywhere, ever had lied.
Into the hall Bush brought a green bag
And in his lapel wore his little tin flag.
His eyes were like BBs, his smile was a smirk.
You knew at first glance that this guy was a jerk.
"Brave men and women, I bring you good cheer
If platitude with attitude you're eager to hear!
The folks of Iraq will have nothing to dread
When Saddam and his boys are all of them dead.
I've brought gifts to Iraq, in my green bag you see:
Since government's bad, I'll leave anarchy;
Since oil-funded socialism cannot be free,
I'll give to the cut-throats our economy.
Here's all you need for your great Christmas feast,
And for Arabs and Kurds, peace in the Mideast.
Should democracy here not turn out just fine,
I'll leave justice and freedom for all Palestine.
Whatever you hear, you will not make the error
Of thinking that you're not at war against terror.
The people of Texas kill enough of their own!
They don't need Al Queda; their terror's homegrown."
And giving a wave and a victory "V"
Bush with his gang went sweeping by me
To climb up the stairs of their big Boeing sleigh
That quickly began to take them away.
But I heard him exclaim as he soared out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all on the radical right!" -- from a viewer

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