States Grammar School Interim Report to Parents,
by Nancy Greggs
Mr. and Mrs. G.H.W. Bush,
again, it is that time of year when we update
the parents of our students on their child's
progress, and we regret to inform you that your
son, Georgie, is not doing as well as we'd hoped
and expected when he embarked on his four-year
program at our school.
you are well aware, Georgie was installed as
class president at the start of the school year,
despite the fact that the majority of his fellow
students did not vote for him. We foresaw problems
immediately, but were assured by several school
board members (who, as we understand it, are
friends of your family) that this would not
result in any real difficulty. Unfortunately,
they have been proven wrong.
the area of scholastic achievement, despite
our best efforts, Georgie is still reading and
speaking at a grade level far below our usual
standards.. At this point, we are not sure if
his failure to learn is due to laziness and
a lack of ability to apply himself to his studies,
or if he simply lacks the intellectual capacity
to improve in these areas.
oral presentations to the class are particularly
troubling; it is apparent that Georgie has not
read the necessary materials, and he often simply
fabricates facts to hide this shortcoming. In
oral exams, he tends to repeat the same answers
over and over, e.g. "The economy is good; jobs
are on their way," indicating a profound failure
to keep up with the Current Events portion of
also tends to fabricate elaborate stories about
himself - which, admittedly, can sometimes be
very amusing. During a school celebration last
May, he delighted his fellow students by coming
to class in a little "flight suit" (just like
the grown-ups wear!), and had everyone in stitches
with his story about the family dog having eaten
his report card from military pre-school!
the whole, however, Georgie does not play well
with other children. His "leadership" in the
classroom continues to divide many students,
one against the other. Other study groups, such
as our French and German-language classes, are
no longer willing to cooperate with Georgie's
group, even though they have traditionally done
so in the past.
son also displays a lack of taking responsibility
for his failings, and seems unable to appreciate
the consequences of his actions. Although he
was provided with the best textbooks on the
subjects of the Economy, Job Creation, The Environment,
et cetera, these books were damaged or completely
destroyed within a matter of months. Georgie
insists that he "inherited" these books in poor
condition, despite all evidence to the contrary.
(In fact, these same textbooks were previously
used by one of our very best students, who actually
returned them in better condition than he found
his first few weeks with us, Georgie quickly
became part of a group of other "problem students."
Despite warnings, he has consistently befriended
children whom we consider to be "bad elements,"
such as Little Kenny Lay and a foreign-exchange
student named Chalabi. Both of these youngsters
have been expelled from other schools due to
their involvement in cheating other students
out of their lunch money. We feel that these
kinds of relationships can only lead to no good,
and hope that you will advise your child accordingly.
often displays aggressive behaviour in the schoolyard,
and recently assaulted a student in another
school district, completely unprovoked. When
asked about this incident, Georgie insisted
that the other child was armed and dangerous.
When investigation into the matter proved otherwise,
Georgie changed his story several times: he
was just trying to "democratize" the other child,
the other child's school was harboring gang
members, and so on. Quite frankly, his story
on this topic has so changed from week to week,
we simply can't trust his word at all anymore.
friends, while not great in number, are very
loyal, but tend to be over-protective. If any
of the other students point out Georgie's failing
grades, these friends simply shout them down
and tell them not to speak at all. When Georgie
was summoned to the principal's office several
weeks ago, he insisted that his "best friend"
come with him. We feel that it is in Georgie's
best interest to learn to stand up for himself;
failure to do so could seriously damage his
ability to handle a leadership role in his adult
you are aware, final exams will be held in November,
and Georgie's past performance leads us to conclude
that he will not be able to achieve the grades
necessary to continue on with another four-year
term at our institution.
Ms. J.Q. Public,